I can’t believe that in less than 3 weeks, we’ll be parents. After such a long struggle, it doesn’t seem like it could ever be possible. Every day I’ve thought “I can’t believe I’m pregnant.” Even though my belly now attracts stares wherever I go. Even though I can see the babies moving around on a very regular basis. Even though I’ve seen them in 3D. Moving. Practicing breathing. Blinking. Their little hearts beating, their chests moving up and down, their (strong) little arms and legs waving around.
Yet here we are. They’ll be here in less than 3 weeks. Either 2 weeks and 6 days, or even less. It’s hard to wrap my head around it, and now that it’s so close, it’s finally starting to kick in – we’re having babies. Two babies. We’re going to be parents. I can barely think about being a Mom – I think I’m still afraid to jinx it. I still have a hard time calling them by their names and “she” and “her” and even “my babies.” They’re usually “the babies” and “this one” and “A” and “B.” I’ve allowed myself to enjoy every day of this pregnancy, but I think I still put a little bit of distance between me and them. Just a tiny bit.
Even after 5 years of dreaming and planning and hoping, I still don’t feel ready. But they’ll be here soon, and life will never be the same, and I am so excited for the road ahead.