I never say that things can’t get worse – because I know that no matter how bad things are, they can always, always get worse.
Friday afternoon the nurse called me back to tell me that the RE wants us to skip a month. The clomid made my lining too thin so they want to give it an extra month to get back to normal. As if that weren’t upsetting enough, the following month we’ll be out of town during the entire week that everything would need to happen. So our next chance won’t be until the end of June.
The end of June is forever away. I can’t believe it. I feel like this will never end.
I know that 2 months seems like nothing. And really, I know it is. But it doesn’t feel like it, at all. It feels like ages and ages away. It feels like the unattainable future. It feels like forever.
I believe that miracles happen. But not for me.
IComLeavWe: Join the Conversation
Your life has a greater future than what your mind is allowing you to see now. Beleive in miracles because they do happen. Love to you both.
Hello…sorry to see that your cycle was cancelled! It is very, very hard to get past these roadblocks, I know. I just had a woman in Kuwait send me her desperate question regarding her lining…she is being completely mismanaged by her docs. Just keep in mind that you have someone watching you carefully & I hope, making all the right decisions. Trust is important. As an infertility specialist is is very hard for me to inform patients that something is not going quite right & we have to pause, change course, rethink etc. Good luck with your journey & don’t let yourself lose sight of your goal. ICLW #7
I know that 2 months can seem like an eternity but it is not. It will be here before you know it. One of the many things I have had to learn through the suck that is IF is to let go of expectations and timelines. Be patient, be positive. You are supported. Try to take the break to take care of yourself, foster your relationship, enjoy being child-free. I know, I know, easier said than done. But you don’t want to move through life just waiting. Your uterus needs to be healthy and strong to house your little one. And taking a break will help tune you up.
Best, Gurlee
P.S. Your blog’s name is awesome 🙂
i am sorry.
Stacie, I am so sorry. I have also been hopeful and yes, I am so disappointed for you but I am still hopeful. I love you so much and am praying every day for good things to happen for you.
I’m so sorry. I know that 2 months seems like an eternity, even when you have been ttc for over 3 years. Every month is precious, but it’s important to give your body a chance to recoop and get your lining to where it needs to be.
I assume this means that you will skip Clomid on the next round. Or, at least I hope so. HOpefully injectables will work for you. Wishing you all the best.
iclw
I believe that miracles can happen for you and Darek. There are so many people who love you, pray for you, and are walking along side you and Darek as you go thru so much heartache. I wish I could take away all your pain and sorrow; just want you to know how much I love you.
I’m sorry that you’re on hold, waiting is so hard, and feeling like you’re not doing anything doesn’t help. Remember that you are doing something, you’re building your lining to make a more hospitable place and make a BFP more likely in the future.
ICLW
Love you!
It really sucks, but hang in there
~Stopping by for ICLW #126
Some songs that get me through my lowest days lately:
Mumford and Sons-The Cave, Awake My Soul, White Blank Page
Noah and the Whale-Blue Skies, The First Days of Spring
Laura Marling-Hope In The Air, I Speak Because I Can
They’re dark, but just enough hope to make me think I’m not wallowing completely.
As hard as it is, take it as a blessing in disguise. This break may be just what your body (and mind) needs to destress and be ready for the little miracle that awaits you. Good luck!!
BTW, I just added your link on my blog! (ICLW #90)