The Eternal Guest Room

Infertility kinda sucks.

facebook sucks

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So everybody knows about Facebook – the social website designed solely for the purpose of announcing your pregnancy, giving constant updates on your pregnancy, commenting on other people’s pregnancies, and then posting constant photos of your child once it’s born.

Wait, that’s not what it’s for?

I’m being facetious of course. Obviously that’s not what it’s for – but to me, it feels like it sometimes. Of course, in my Facebook feed, nobody is pregnant or has small children. Discovering the “hide” feature was one of the best days of my life. I’m not even sure who I’m friends with sometimes because I haven’t seen their updates in years. Unfortunately “friends'” comments to hidden “friends” still pop up, as do other things.

It probably sounds really immature but I tend to get really upset when certain things show up. So I do my best to stay away from Facebook. There’s no need to torture myself more than I already do. But I do break down on occasion and go back there. Always at the worst time – like the day when yet another newlywed makes their announcement or the day maternity photos are posted or some other depressing thing.

I’ve considered deleting my account, and one of these days it might come to that point. I’ve considered de-friending people, but I don’t want to be totally rude. For now, I just try to stay away.

I’ve already made some decisions for the future, if I ever have the chance to implement them. I will never use an ultrasound photo for my profile picture – Lame! I will never complain about the inconveniences of being pregnant – Annoying! I will not post offensive things such as “having children is the only reason to live” or “you can’t know real love until you have a child” or similar such things – Rude!

You might be thinking: “Yeah, you say that now, but you’ll change your mind.” I won’t. After 3+ years of this, I’m hypersensitive in a crazy way, not only to my feelings but to others’ as well, and that isn’t just going to melt away anytime soon.

I’m having a bad week and feeling extra grumpy today. Can you tell?

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